Monday, May 29, 2006

i can do this

I've been thinking a lot about age this week - no real surprise there. A friend of mine asked if I was a member of the "30 and Proud" club and I am. No turning 29 again for me. I was thinking back to what I was doing ten years ago and I realized that for me, my 20s were a lot of upheaval, a lot of totally changing my life and wondering if I could do it.

You're going along through high school, and if you live in Ontario you're 19 when you graduate. It's time to go away to university and your whole world changes. I remember sitting in my room at my parents' house and I could almost feel it slipping away. I could always come back, but I could never GO back. Off I went to school wondering "can I do this?"

Four incredible years later it happens again. You graduate and this life that you have built for yourself is pulled apart again. You have to move, find a job, make new friends and I wondered again, "can I do this?"

Many people spend their 20s looking for someone to share their life with and some find them right away and others don't but I think in both situations people are asking themselves "can I do this?" Can I build a life with this person? Can I build a life without them?

What I'm finding now is that there's a reason to be 30 and Proud because sitting here I can say with confidence, "I can do this". I know how to build a life. I know what I need to be happy, to be healthy, to be who I am. Because I also know this, that at some point it will happen again, the world will change and I'll be ready. I can do this.

2 comments:

the salmon said...

it sounds like you are in a great place. its so wonderful when we can look back and think, "i had to go through that, but i'm so glad its over. its so nice to be exactly where i am and who i am!"

your post makes me want to smile and cry at the same time. thanks for sharing those thoughts :)

i have always been the kind of person to through myself into things, regret or get scared and want to back out. it was such a great lesson for me to learn to be content in every circumstance and happy with where i am.

JAnie & DAve said...

Claire, Great post. I am inspired. I am thankful for all that i have, but sometimes i feel too young to be enjoy 'this' life. I am sure that there will be challenges for me to overcome where ever i am, whatever i do. Happy happy 30 (secrectly i have always wanted to be older than i am. but i'm not, and i can live with that.) Love Janie